


Eat My Heart, Make Me Feel

by t0bemadeofglass



Category: Marvel (Movies), The Avengers (2012)
Genre: Bad!Steve, Complete, F/M, Good!Steve, Loki is the god of mischief and he very much enjoys that role, M/M, Multi, Post-Avengers, dual personalities, multi-pairings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-25
Updated: 2013-07-28
Packaged: 2017-12-12 23:34:50
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 21,916
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/817351
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/t0bemadeofglass/pseuds/t0bemadeofglass
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Two Steves?” Tony was asking Jarvis, seemingly on the same brainwave.  “J, explain this to me.” </p><p>“I do not know, sir,” the AI insisted again.  “He just began to split and suddenly there were two of the Captain Rogers.  Judging by their brain patterns and early mannerisms, sir, it seems as though they were split based on personality differences.  One would be the Id, the other seems to be resemble that of a child.” "</p><p>After everyone's favorite trickster god casts a spell on Steve Rogers the Avengers are left with two versions of the same man: one representing the best and most wholesome side of the Captain they know and love, and the other everything he's ever repressed or kept to himself.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> What started out as a crack!fic turned into something I decided was going to be multi-chaptered, though I'm not quite sure just how long it'll be! I'm certainly excited though =] Title comes from the song Feast of the Heart, and while this was supposed to be one of my one-shots I'm still counting this as fic 21/50.  
> I hope you enjoy! Comments and kudos and reads are always appreciated!  
> Also, this is unbeta'd, so any and all mistakes are my own.  
> This will also be updated on my tumblr: futurerustfuture-dust.tumblr.com

“All Avengers please report to Captain Rogers’ room.”  Jarvis’ voice rang through the Avengers tower, making Natasha’s head pick up from her book.  Oh, God, what did Steve have in mind now?  If it was another team bonding exercise she was going to have a few words to say about that.  The last time he’d tried to get them all to come out and talk about their past and their parents and, well, it seemed he was the only one (besides Thor, of course, but his parents were gods after all) who’d had a decent childhood.  It hadn’t ended well, and Nat seriously hoped that whatever he had in mind was something a little more lighthearted than that.  What she found, instead, was a group of arguing super heroes in a room that looked as though it’d survived a tornado surrounding a pair of Steves.  Wait.  She blinked rapidly as she took her spot between Tony and Thor, trying to wrap her mind around what was happening.  How were there two of them?  Identical in every way to the Steve Rogers she knew their only differences came from the way they held themselves; the one on the left looked as if he was ready to turn on any of them at any moment, while the one on the right held himself as though he might fall apart.  The latter reminded her of a child she’d seen back in Russia, cold and terrified, shivering in front of the group of adults as he listened to them talk and decide what was going on.  

But how could they discuss that when they had no idea what was even happening?  

“Two Steves?” Tony was asking Jarvis, seemingly on the same brainwave.  “J, explain this to me.”

“I do not know, sir,” the AI insisted again.  “He just began to split and suddenly there were two of the Captain Rogers.  Judging by their brain patterns and early mannerisms, sir, it seems as though they were split based on personality differences.  One would be the Id, the other seems to be resemble that of a child.”

“Hey.”  The Steve on the right drew the word out, glancing up at the ceiling with a hurt expression.  “You don’t have to be so rude!”

“Understood J, what else?” Tony asked, ignoring the outburst as he looked from one of the twins to the other.  “I mean, did someone divide by zero and now suddenly we just happen to have two Steve Rogers?”

“Not quite sir.  From the readings I am getting from the two their personality split is magic-based.”

The groan that went through the room was collective and four sets of eyes turned to Thor, who just gave a nervous laugh.  “I suppose I should go visit my brother, should I not?  I am sure that this was simply a harmless prank.”

“Harmless?” Bruce asked, a dry laugh leaving his lips as he removed his glasses to clean them and shook his head.  Nat was about in the same boat.  “You call this harmless?  What if someone attacks and we need Captain America?”

“Can we not simply send them both into the fray?”

“That’s what I’m talking about.  A fight.”  The voice that came out was enough to silence Tony and Bruce’s banter.  It was thick, deep, with an accent born and bred from the heart of Brooklyn and pulled at something deep inside Natasha, the heat pooling in her navel.  Woah.  Where had that come from, and why had Cap been holding it back for so long? The Steve on the left was grinning, the corners of his lips pulled too far back, as though he’d never heard such a good idea.  “Point me in the right direction.”

“Hey, no.  I need to run tests on the both of you, figure out what’s exactly going on.  We don’t know what it’s going to do to Rogers with you two being, well, split.”  Tony said. “So, Steve . . . Steves.  Don’t leave.  Don’t even think about it.  Your asses are mine until I give the go ahead.”  He frowned, looking from one to the other.  “How about we just call you Good and Bad Steve?”  

“That’s more of a mouthful than it needs to be,” Natasha murmured, speaking up for the first time though it wasn’t anything unusual.  It did garner her an appreciative look from who Tony was now calling Evil Steve, and the look in his eyes was one Natasha was familiar with but not on Steve Rogers’ face.  She renamed the one on the right Steve, and the one on the left Rogers.  Tony rolled his eyes.  

“At least mine was inventive.”

“Good and Bad?” Clint snorted.  “Really?  You’re one of the more morally ambiguous people here and you classified him between good and bad.”

“Shut it, Hawk.”

The two dissolved into a bickering match that made Natasha sigh.  Children.  She was surrounded by children.  With Bruce’s help she managed to escort the two halves of Steve Rogers to the lab, Tony and Clint following after.  Thor stayed behind, likely to take off for the bifrost site soon afterwards.  If this was Loki, and really who else had the skill or ability or desire to play a prank like this, then the sooner he got moving the sooner he could start tracking the trickster.  Natasha roughed it out to about two to three weeks they’d have to wait, two days after that to convince Loki if they were lucky and he was in a good mood, and then they should have their normal Captain America back.  She eyed the two embodiments of the man she called Captain, her curiosity getting the better of her.  “Do you two share the same memories, or the same mannerisms as our Cap did?” She asked when they’d crowded into the elevator to be taken down the four floors.  Tony and Clint went silent and all eyes fell on the pair.  Rogers was quiet for a moment and shook his head.  “I remember battles.  Anger.  Everything in between is black and blank.”  

“And I remember everything but fighting.”  Steve admitted, voice a soft squeak under all the attention.  His face was changing between three different shades of red, varying on whether or not he looked up to meet the eyes of those around him.  He was kind of cute, Natasha had to admit, his eyes wide and terrified like a little lost puppy.  She couldn’t help but admit she wanted to run her hands through his hair and promise him it was going to be alright, that everything would be fine, but that wasn’t exactly true, nor was it something she was prepared to do in front of the others.  Clint would never let her live it down, and Nat was nothing if not proud of her reputation.  

“So Cap compartmentalizes when he’s on and off the field.  Makes sense.  Likely how he’s not gone crazy yet; he gets all his aggression and anger out when Rogers comes out,” Bruce murmured, looking from the one twin to the next.  “And reverts back to Steve when he doesn’t need to exorcise his demons.”

“Sounds like DID to me,” Tony muttered.

“Or a good coping mechanism,” Natasha offered, defensive.  Tony had his drinking, Bruce had a near literal demon hiding inside of him that he could release if he needed to, Clint had his nest and Natasha . . . Natasha had vodka and so many different personalities it would have made Freud’s head spin.  Cap was nothing, if not normal, in comparison to the rest of them.  

Steve turned to smile at Natasha, his face an open book of how grateful he was for her understanding. In fact he seemed to crowd closer to her as they exited the elevator, and Nat couldn't help but smile. As she'd thought before he was cute, reminding her of a young golden retriever. He seemed to have the boundless energy of one, all but bouncing off of the walls as they made their way to the medical bay.  As Stark had said he wanted to run some tests, and Natasha couldn’t blame him for that.  Who knew what the changes Loki had made to the Steves would have done to their genetic makeup; they might have looked fine on the outside but inside?  Well, she hoped that the tests returned normal.  

“We should call Fury about this,” Natasha said once they were all settled inside the medical room, Tony and Bruce flitting around the twins; Bruce working with Steve while Tony focused on Rogers.  Natasha didn’t miss how Rogers’ eyes were taking in every inch of the scientist as he worked, his eyes flashing a mix of lust and interest that nearly made her laugh.  She’d never seen Captain America look so, well, less than wholesome.  Stark seemed to have noticed it as well, a spring in his step Natasha had only ever associated with him getting ready to go in for the kill.  

“Sure, do whatever you want Tasha.”  Stark said, smiling over at her.  Bruce nodded his agreement, while Clint’s eyes went wide.

“Shit, Phil’s gonna kill me if he has to hear this from Fury and not me--gimme ten?”

Nat let herself chuckle as she nodded and he walked away to call his boyfriend, his voice bright and chipper and more than likely setting off Phil's bullshit sensor. In his absence Jarvis took the time to call the Director, and when he picked up Tony ran through what he and Bruce found: Both halves of Steve Rogers were well and functioning and, well, as perfect as ever. Save the whole being split into two ordeal there was nothing different genetically about them.

"I want eyes on them at all times, no exceptions. No offense Cap," he said, "but you are too valuable to this team to let something happen to either one of you."

"So we're babysitting?" Tony asked. He might've come off as disbelieving if Nat hadnt seen he and Rogers making eyes at one another.

"Yes, Stark. At all times."

"I don't want to be around him." Steve's voice was quiet, almost nervous, and garnered a glare from Rogers. "I've seen what he's capable of and I know what he'll do."

"Steve, I can assure you no harm will come to you."

"It's fine Nick," Natasha cut in. "Tony, you take Rogers and I'll take Steve. We'll keep you two as separate during the day as we can manage."

He looked relieved and shot her a grateful grin, all charm and adorable enthusiasm. His thank-you was punctuated by Tony's agreement. He likely wanted time alone with Rogers and Nat had to keep herself from laughing. He looked like he was in for a hell of a night. Nat had a bit of experience with super soldier serums and what it did to a person's libido. For Rogers, who'd been repressed for so long, well, she doubted Stark would be able to walk straight for a month.

“Sounds good Romanov.  Anything else I need to know about these two before I let you go?” the Director said, sounding skeptical.  Nat paused as she looked over at Tony, who shrugged.  

“All clear on this end.”

“That’ll be all, sir.  Thank you.”  They clicked off after receiving the affirmative from Fury and Natasha moved to sit beside Steve’s bed.  Bruce flitted from the screens around him to the docile super soldier, whose fingers were tapping out an erratic beat.  Whether out of the need to get all that pent up energy out or from nerves Natasha couldn’t tell, but she closed her hand over his and squeezed.  He turned, trying to read her expression, and she offered him a smile.  

“You doing okay?”

He nodded quickly, closing his eyes as Bruce came at him with another needle.  He really hated them.  Really.  They reminded him of being back home when Ma was still around, having to go to those doctors for both her and himself, watching them come at him with needles to take blood samples after blood samples, or else to give her medicine that was supposed to help her but never did.  They only ever made her weaker and he couldn’t help himself from trembling as he felt the needle dig into his arm.  Natasha turned their hands so that he could squeeze hers without saying a word, for which he was so grateful.  His discomfort, however, was still noticed.

“Are you seriously squeezing her hand because you’re afraid of needles?” Rogers called over, cackling.  “Pussy.”

Nat’s eyes snapped over to his and her gaze intensified.  “Shut up, Rogers,” she growled.  “If he doesn’t like needles that’s his business, not yours.”

The man rolled his eyes again.  “You forget I was trapped in a body with this idiot,” he drawled, the accent becoming more and more pronounced as he went on, as though he was just remembering and falling back into it.  “God, whoever did this--Loki?  I oughta shake his hand.  He’s done me a huge favor.”

Natasha’s glare turned withering, though he didn’t seem to notice.  Steve squeezed her hand gently, attracting her attention.  

“It’s okay,” he murmured.  He’d dealt with it for so long what did it matter now?  Steve Rogers had always been ashamed of his fear of needles and must have used the other guy to get over them  

The tests took another couple hours before Bruce shooed them all away so he could go over the data, sending Tony with Rogers.  They’d all gotten rather sick of his complaining that he was bored and nothing was going on, so Tony took him down to the recreation room.  Somehow Natasha doubted that was what Rogers had in mind but she wasn’t about to say something.  Tony would figure it out, he always did.  At her side Steve was still smiling.  

“Did you have anything that you needed to do?” He asked, polite as ever.  “I’d hate to get you in trouble if you had work to be finished and I was taking up all your time standing here.”

“No, I’m free for the next few days.”  She was grateful she’d had the foresight to see that her paperwork had to be done soon, having just submitted it to Coulson not a few hours ago.  “Do you feel alright?”  She didn’t know what the proper protocol was or what to expect.  What happened when one got split from their original body into two?  

“Well, I’m kind of hungry.  Mind if we go to the kitchen?” He asked, shooting her a small smile.  As if she could say no to that.

“Of course.  Do you remember the way?”  

He nodded and away he went, babbling all the while.  It turned out he remembered a great deal more than she’d initially thought, though she supposed it made sense.  He was the closest to the normal Steve they had, complete with an overabundance of manners and good old-fashioned charm.  Bless him for it.  She couldn’t help but smile as he opened the door for her and once she was seated at the bar he immediately got to work fixing them both food.  She knew Cap had been a good cook, though Tony usually insisted on having Jarvis cook for them on the basis that the billionaire was incredibly picky about his food, but now to see Steve work . . . well if she was honest he reminded her of a housewife.  Humming as he worked, he practically twirled from the refrigerator to the stove, chopping things up with finese as he planned out what looked to be an extensive lunch.  

“You’re that hungry?” Nat couldn’t help but ask as he set to breaking down a couple chickens.  He looked up, taken aback, and shook his head.

“No but everyone else might be.”  

Oh, Steve.  She just smiled.  At his request Jarvis filled the room with music and Steve was crooning along with Bing Crosby and Dinah Shore, his voice rising with theirs as he worked away.  It was a wonder to watch him do it, too, and Nat couldn’t help but gape as she watched him bounce back and forth between preparing what smelled like fried chicken along with mashed potatoes, and he seemed to have half a mind to make bread as well but he couldn’t find the yeast.  

“Drat,” he muttered.

“Shall I send for one of the other agents to get some?  I believe Agent Coulson is on his way.” The AI chimed in.  

“No, thanks Jarvis--we can make do with biscuits.”  And he was back to being a housewife, all smiles and a spring in his step Nat hadn’t seen . . . well, ever.  

“Where’d you learn to cook all of this?” She asked with an easy smile after he kindly denied her offer to help.  She was a mess in the kitchen, anyway, it was probably for the best that she didn’t.  She was the kind of girl who lived on salad and sandwiches, the easiest food to prepare, or else she dined out when she got a craving for something more.  

“When she first got sick Ma taught me everything she knew,” Steve said, his mood dampening a little.  Nat regretted bringing it up.  “She was afraid I wouldn’t be able to provide for myself, so she made sure to teach me how to cook everything she knew.  She didn’t want me to go hungry.”  His smile was sad when he looked up at her and it might have been the first time outside of battle that Nat had ever seen Steve’s eyes cloud up with tears.  She frowned, nodding her understanding.  

“Well, at least it wasn’t in vain.  Is that why you prefer to do the cooking rather than make Jarvis do it all the time?”

“Yeah.  Feels like I’m honoring her memory.”

They spent the rest of the time in silence, listening to the crooners sing, or the jazz in the background, allowing the music to lighten the mood as Natasha watched Steve work.  When everything was cooking he set out to make dessert, as if he hadn’t already done enough.

“I’m sure it’ll be fine if you don’t make one--.”

“One?  I’m making three.”  He grinned, measuring out the flour, butter, and salt before mixing it all in together by hand.  “You like apple pie, don’t you?”

Of course he would.  Natasha nodded, though if the truth was told she’d never had it before, and couldnt’ help but watch in fascination as he got right to work, not missing a beat while the crusts were cooling in the fridge.  Attracted by the scent of lunch the other members of the Avengers piled in, including Rogers.  Tony, as Nat had suspected, was walking a little funny and sported a few vibrant purple bruises on his neck though he was grinning as if he’d just won the lottery.

“Wow, smells great!” Tony grinned, moving up to Steve and throwing an arm around his shoulders with a small wince.  

Steve, who felt the billionaire's body twitch, looked over and his eyes grew wide as the dinner plates Bruce and Phil, now joining them for the meal, were setting out.  “What on earth happened to you?”

“Don’t worry about me,” Tony insisted, pulling away with a frown.  He wasn’t used to this sort of mothering; Cap usually was pretty good at keeping it to a minimum now that they knew each other well enough.  But Steve wasn’t having any of that, pushing his cheek to the side to gasp as he saw more marks and scratches that disappeared past his collar.  Steve threw a dirty look at his twin.  

“You should be more careful.”

“You aren’t his mother,” Rogers retorted with an eyeroll as he sat beside Natasha.  She tried not to show that she was fighting back a laugh but Rogers caught it.  

“Even Nat thinks it’s funny.”

“Leave me out of this,” she warned, immediately stone-faced.  

“I’d like to include you next time, actually,” he said, voice lowering to a low rumble as he sidled up beside her at the bar.  As before the way the words sounded rolling from his lips, as though he’d just gotten off the streets of downtown Brooklyn, caused heat to pool in her belly.  She pushed it back and snorted.

“You couldn’t handle me.”

“Is that an invitation to try?”

“In your dreams.  I’m not interested in assholes.”

“Well then we don’t have to try it from that position, do we?”

The joke made her laugh in spite of herself.  There was something about seeing it come from the face that championed doing what was right and forties-style mannerisms that just made it too funny for her to take seriously.  Rogers, it seemed, didn’t appreciate her laugh and he had one hand gently squeezing her hip the next moment.  The laugh died on Natasha’s tongue as she glowered over at him.  

“You’ve fought against me before Rogers.  You really want to go at it again?”

“Sure I do, doll, just between the sheets.  I’d appreciate it if you didn’t mock me or consider what I said to be a joke.  It’s not.  I’m propositioning you.”

“And I’m telling you no.”  She pulled away from him, moving instead to help finish setting the table.  Rogers left her alone after that though she felt his gaze on her throughout the night.  Steve’s own concerned looks weren’t helping her out, either, attracting more attention than Natasha was comfortable with.  Why, oh why, had she offered to babysit?  Even when it was the innocent one things never turned out the way it should have.  

“So, how long do you think the spell will last?” Coulson asked.  He’d been grinning non stop as he looked between Rogers and Steve, hardly able to stand that there were two of his favorite people (besides Clint) sitting at the table with him.  

“We won’t really know until Thor gets a hold of Loki, and depending on wherever the bastard is, well, that could take some time.”  Bruce admitted, looking nervous at the idea.  He removed his glasses to clean them, as he did whenever he was considering what to say next, and looked back up at Phil.  “Until then, I’m afraid, we can’t do anything else.  They’ll just have to learn how to coexist and we’ll have to hope that they somehow manage not to kill each other or be killed in the process.  From what I can assume if one of them dies, well, then that personality, that aspect of Steven Rogers, is gone forever.  Nothing that can be done.”

The news is sobering.  From across the table, Steve gulped audibly while Rogers just stares at Bruce, unseeing and likely not wanting to believe the coil of fear Natasha was willing to bet was wrapping itself tight in his stomach.  

“Well, we’ll just have to keep a close eye on you both then,” Coulson said as way of breaking the ice, and conversation picked back up again, though the information that had just passed was lost on no one.  


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Holy smokes--thank you all so much for all the views and the kudos! I didn't expect this to take off like it did, but I appreciate all of it so very, very much. You guys are amazing.

The rest of the day was spent outdoors, Steve having wanted a chance to see the city for himself, rather than relying on what his memories showed him.  Nat didn’t mind, always up for a walk, though they had to be careful that Rogers stayed in the tower.  The last thing they wanted were the tabloids to pick up on there being two Captain Americas and begin to throw around ideas such as twins and cloning (though Shield had, of course, tried the latter.)  Steve was all grins as they slipped out the back door, the pair of them dressed as casually as everyone else.  The blond man at Nat’s side had nearly had a conniption when he saw what she was wearing, even though she’d told him that every girl in New York City was wearing a tank top and short shorts on a day when it was upwards of 80 degrees.  Honestly, did he want her in a gown, complete with petticoats and corset?

‘Rogers might want the latter if only so he could rip it off.’

No.  Bad Nat.  She was not going to give into a hormone-ridden, repressed Rogers, even if his accent did practically melt her panties off.  

New topic.  

She forced herself to smile and listen in to what Steve was saying about how beautiful the lighting was and how he wished he had brought his sketchbook.  It would’ve been the perfect day to draw, he’d said as he gazed up at the skyline, drinking in the very much alive and vibrant world around him, and even though they were surrounded on all sides the way Steve described it one would think it a living thing.  

“We can go back for your sketchbook,” Natasha offered when he commented on how amazing the cloud structures were when they reflected on the glass of the buildings above.  “Or buy you a brand new one if you need it.”

He shook his head, lips parted in an embarrassed smile.  “Oh, no.  I couldn’t possibly ask for you to go trouble yourself for something so stupid.  Besides, I’ve got a good memory.  It’s more or less picking things up as I go.”  

"Really? Have you always had that?" Nat asked, realizing she didn't know he could remember so well. Maybe that was why he'd always threw the best surprise parties because he remembered all their birthdays.  Even for Natasha, who wasn't even aware what day her birthday really was, he'd been sure to ask for her file to check. She'd never thought it important but Cap? He'd gone above and beyond as he did with everything. She smiled at the memory.

Steve nodded, jogging her out of her thoughts. "Yeah, even before the serum. Sure helped a lot with school."

"I bet." Nat murmured, surveying the small crowd that had surrounded them as they waited to cross the street. "Well alright then. I guess that makes sense why your drawings are always incredibly detailed, and really well done."

"You think so?" Steve asked, flashing her his best, most infectious smile, the one that made even the corners of her lips twitch upwards.

Unfortunately she wasn't the only one who'd noticed. From behind her there was an ecstatic shriek and Natasha was pushed aside as a blonde woman came to stand, gawking, in front of Steve.

"Are you Captain America?" She gasped, her eyes wide as she took him in.  Nat guessed that even in a leather coat, pair of khakis and button down he couldn’t hide who he really was, though he didn’t exactly look as if he was from the same era as everyone else.  

Steve’s face flushed bright red but he nodded anyway, eliciting another cry of surprise from the woman as she hastened to turn around and show him the tattoo she’d gotten of his shield with a heart around it right on her tailbone.  Nat nearly snorted, feeling more embarrassed for the woman than anything else, while Steve just looked mortified and turned his gaze elsewhere.  The poor guy wasn’t used to all the praise, and the woman’s outburst had garnered them more attention than they’d wanted.  

“Ma’am,” Natasha started, coming up to the blonde woman’s side and grabbing her arm forcefully.  Perhaps it was a little harder than necessary, causing the woman to wince in discomfort, but it shut her up.  “We’re trying to enjoy a nice day outside without attracting too much attention.  Would it be possible to not cause a scene?” She asked, tone biting as she raised one eyebrow.  But the woman wasn’t going for that, her own gaze heating up with fury at Natasha’s request.  She tried to wrench her arm out of Natasha’s grip, explaining that she just wanted to talk with one of her heroes, but the spy’s grip was far too strong, growing tighter the more the woman tried to pull away.

“Ma’am, I’m going to ask you one more time and then things are going to get physical.” Natasha’s voice had dropped to a low warning, practically oozing with the threat without having to exert any further force.  

That was all it seemed to take, and though the woman looked pleadingly to Steve, as if she expected him to intervene, when he didn’t help her at all she agreed to Natasha’s request and headed off in the opposite direction.  Only after she planted a quick kiss on Steve’s cheek and murmured something in his ear that made him blush about ten more shades of red.  The woman was gone a moment later, leaving Natasha on the verge of seething and Steve a babbling mess.  

“Sorry about that,” Nat murmured once they’d managed to put a good distance between themselves and where the woman had disappeared to.  Thankfully, what had just happened didn’t seem to have garnered them attention from anyone else, and they managed to blend back in with the crowds going to and fro down the busy streets of downtown New York.  

“It’s okay.  Are . . . are all women that forthright and outgoing?” He asked, voice tinged with surprise and fear as he stared down at her with wide blue eyes.  Impossibly innocent was the phrase that came to mind.  

“Not usually, but you’re something of a celebrity now.”  Nat said with a quick smirk, trying to lighten the mood as she pointed to a large graffitied building wall.  It read out that it believed in the Avengers, followed by each of their names; Cap’s had been spelled out and stylized in a bright blue and lined with white.  It didn’t seem to comfort or ease Steve’s nerves, however, and he just muttered about how it wasn’t right for them to deface a building like that.

“It’s not a bad thing,” Natasha insisted and for a moment she dropped her hand into Steve’s grip to squeeze it quickly.  “It’s a symbol of pride for most, that there’s a man so willing to do everything for his country he puts his life on the lines to fight aliens to protect the city.  You’re a national hero.”

“I know that, or at least Captain America does,” Steve said, turning to look at her as they stopped at another crosswalk.  “I just don’t understand why.  I mean, I’m nothing special, I’m just a kid from Brooklyn.  Really.  I just got lucky.”

Lucky wasn’t really the word Natasha would’ve chosen for it.  He was special, even if he was too humble to see it.  He would one of these days, she was confident of that, and for the time she said nothing else, removing her hand a moment after he’d realized it was there and turned bright red out of surprise.  

“You really don’t have a handle on the whole blushing thing, do you?” She teased as they neared the park, the sound of kids playing filling the air the closer they got.  

He laughed, face lighting up with the small jab as he shook his head.  “Not really.  I’ve always been really bad when it comes to talking to women--dames--ladies, sorry.”  And he was back to flushing bright red.  Nat only shook her head and patted him on the back, leading him around the paths that wound in and out of the trees and grassy lawns.  It wasn’t too busy of a day being the middle of the week, but there were still enough people to make Natasha nervous.  After the first outburst, well, the last thing she needed was one overzealous child figuring out that the Captain America was in the park.  Not that she wasn’t sure Steve would love it.  He was already making friends with nearly everyone who crossed their paths, catching the occasional wayward frisbee and doing his best to gently throw it back in order to avoid taking off heads or limbs in the process.  He really couldn’t see that he was something of a rarity within the Avengers, someone so pure and so ridiculously, almost obscenely, good it made Nat’s teeth hurt to think about it.  Even with all he’d been through he still, somehow, maintained the most positive outlook on life she’d ever heard of, and it was no wonder his repressed side was so, well, determined to get out and explore the world.  If Natasha had been caged up, forced to view a life through the eyes of another so obviously different she’d have gone insane, too.  

Maybe Loki’s spell would do Cap some good, provide a little more balance to his life. After all, it had to be exhausting being that good and wholesome all the time.  Hell, Nat got tired after a few hours of it.  But seeing Steve so carefree and so open with himself for the first time in God only knew how long she wasn’t sure that putting them back together would be a good idea, even if Thor could find Loki.  She knew the semantics of it, knew why it had to happen, why it had to be reversed but right then and there?  Well, keeping them apart seemed more of a kindness than anything else.  

“Do you want to play?” Steve’s voice once again broke her out of her state of mind.  He was offering her a frisbee, which he’d just borrowed from a pair of kids that apparently had lent out their spare one to him, and though Nat had never played before in her life she found herself nodding anyway.  The better part of the afternoon was spent by Steve teaching Natasha the finer points in how to throw the plastic disk, how the game was played, and eventually tossing it back and forth between the two.  Thought it seemed oddly quaint she had to admit it was fun; it helped that her partner was a super soldier capable of throwing it just as fast as she could run (which was saying something) and when she returned fire he was more than able to catch it as well, no matter how sly she thought she was by making it curve halfway through, or chucking it as hard as she could to make it less predictable.  

By the time they got back to the tower Steve was all atwitter with how much fun he’d had during their outing, mouth running a mile a minute as he explained how he’d loved to play in the park as a kid, his ma having taken him whenever she’d had a free moment.  Aside from that he and Bucky used to go all the time, pretending to be cops and robbers as all children who grew up seemed to, letting their imaginations fill in the blank time.  Nat just smiled as she listened to him reminisce.  

“And thanks so much for coming with me,” Steve added just before they parted ways, Natasha saying that she needed a shower while Steve wanted to get dinner started.  

Nat just nodded, unsure what else there was to say besides: “Of course, anytime.”  He turned to head to the kitchen while Nat asked Jarvis to keep an eye on him, or at least alert the other Avengers that someone had to stick with him just in case.  She didn’t know where Rogers and Stark were, though knowing Tony it was likely either the bedroom or his workshop.  One thing she did know, though, was that she was going to take full advantage of the silence and peace to relax.  God knew she’d earned it, walking around on pins and needles to try and not offend Steve with her language or mannerisms.  He was accustomed to mild-mannered women who were quiet and did as they were told, while Nat, well, she’d never done well with that, especially after she’d gotten out of the Red Room.  

Her room was dark when she entered, though the hair stood up on the back of her neck the moment she stepped through the threshold.  Heart stuttering in her chest, she shifted ever-so slightly to the left, inhaling deep as though nothing had gone wrong as she tried to pick up on a scent, and once her fingers found the light switch she pushed it on.  Rogers was lounging on her bed, a wide smirk set on his lips and his bright blue eyes, the same she’d seen innocence and purity in not ten minutes ago, now broadcasted nothing but mischief.  She thought her heart may give out, but she kept her face blank as she surveyed him.  There were a few matching hickeys that Stark must have left on his throat, but aside from that she couldn’t see much else under his black t-shirt and deep blue jeans.  

Well, at least Stark had gotten him a half decent wardrobe.  

“Can I help you?” She asked, one eyebrow arching.

“Sure you can, sweetie.”  He rose from his spot, movements slow and smooth, as though he were a liquid instead of a solid figure.  She recognized the gait, too, as her own.  He must’ve copied what he’d seen her done to countless targets and emulated it, thinking it would excite her.  All she saw was years of training to be that smooth and that agile in the Red Room, the constant threat of messing up over her head.  Her look of curiosity wavered for a moment, fighting for supremacy with a scowl.  “But I think you already know why I’m here so why should I waste my breath?”  He’d stopped a moment away from her, so close she could taste the peppermint on his breath from when he must’ve been chewing gum, could feel the heat radiating off of his body against her own.  She controlled her breathing as only years of training had taught her how, staring up at him with defiant eyes.  

“Good question, stop wasting it.  I know the question, you know the answer.  Now get out, I need to shower.”  She pushed past him, her shoulder knocking hard against his.  Before she moved out of his reach he stretched out one hand to circle around her wrist, firmly securing her into place.  She could have him on the floor in a hummingbird heartbeat if she chose, and was about to when he spoke.  

“Want company?” He asked, voice a quiet purr.  She had to remind herself that this was still, somehow, Cap, and no she couldn’t slit his throat for being such an ass.  And yet . . . she looked back at him, disdain and distaste for him playing in her gaze yet when he stared back all she could see was longing.  

How the hell was she supposed to say no to that?

“Fine.  Don’t make me regret it.”  She growled, yanking her arm away from him and glaring.  He followed her all the way into the bathroom, waiting until after she’d turned on the water to twist her around and crash his lips against hers.  It wasn’t like anything she would have expected from Steve, or even from Cap.  No, this was harsh, demanding, full of teeth and growls and a struggle for dominance.  He sucked at her bottom lip, trying to make her moan, though the most he got was a breathy groan as she slipped her fingers under his shirt and trace the well defined muscles of his abs.  They pulled apart just to strip, Rogers’ fingers fumbling with his belt as Natasha smoothly slipped out of the tank top, shorts, bra and panties in the time it took for him to get his shirt and belt off.  She snorted.

“It better not take you this long for everything else,” she challenged.  “Otherwise I might just fall asleep.”  

“The only time you’ll want sleep is to recover from what I’m about to do to you,” he growled, eyes flashing as he grabbed her fast again and sank his lips onto her throat.  It freed up his hands as she let herself moan quietly under his teeth and warm lips, his tongue stroking her pulse point gently to send shivers up her spine.  She barely noticed that he was naked, and only realized they were in the shower when the hot water splashed on her skin, bringing up goosebumps where it hit from the sudden heat.  She shuddered when he pulled away and hoisted her instead into his arms, positioning her perfectly so that the tip of him was pressed to her center.  She bit her bottom lip, eyes meeting his, as one of his hands, wet from the shower water, found the split between her legs and pressed his thumb to her clit.  She jumped at the sensation, a muffled cry of pleasure leaving her lips, before he silenced her with another kiss and kept the pressure and motion on her bundle of nerves.  He wasn’t satisfied until her body was seizing up with an orgasm that snuck up on her, taking her by surprise as she shouted against his lips.  When she loosened up, muscles relaxed and an easy grin spreading on her face, he pushed into her without so much as a problem.  

Oh.  God above, what had she gotten into?  He didn’t give her much time to accomidate, and though it would’ve been appreciated because he was in no means a small man she was skilled enough to get used to it without much of a fuss.  In a moment her hips were rutting against his, cries of pleasure escaping her lips as he all but fucked her into the wall, hips pistoning against hers so hard she knew they would bruise.  Pent up sexual tension was putting it lightly, not that Nat was complaining.  

“Come on babe,” he muttered against her lips as he pulled away.  While one of his hands supported her bottom without the slightest of efforts, tilting her hips forward so that he hit the perfect spot every time, the other reached up to grasp her chin and forced her to look at him.  His blond hair was sticking to his head, wet with perspiration and the hot water that filled the shower with steam, and his gaze was wild with lust and want.  “I want to hear you.  Say my name babe.”  He demanded, hips snapping against hers.  

“Fuck--Rogers!” She shouted, the words a little scratchy from all the yelling she’d already been doing.  

“Louder,” he growled, hold on her chin tightening.  She obliged, screaming his name as she tightened around him.  It was apparently enough to send him over the edge too, her own name leaving his mouth in the form of a moan.  As they stood there, both of them trying to catch their breath, he turned his attention to her neglected breasts, kissing the firm skin and murmuring “next time,” as if he was so certain they’d go at it again.  

The worst part was the slick bastard was right.  That was amazing, and even though Nat wouldn’t be able to speak right for a couple hours while her vocal chords healed, she couldn’t deny that had been one of the best times she’d had in quite awhile.  

Damn him.  

Eventually he pulled out and set her slowly on the ground.  He eyed her as she cleaned between her legs first before following up with the rest of her body.  

“I don’t need to worry about you getting pregnant, do I?” He asked, as if there was anything he could do about it.  Nat snorted and shook her head.  No, she was fine and he didn’t have to worry, she assured him of that.  The last thing she’d want was Cap coming back to find out that he had a baby on the way from something he’d not been able to wholly participate in or even possibly enjoy.  

They went separate ways after the shower, Rogers retreating to the training room as Nat went to go find Steve and see how dinner was going, a spring in her step that hadn’t been there for some time.  

 


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Holy crap I'm so sorry it took me so long to get this out! I struggled with this for goodness knows how long, but I hope it turned out a-okay! Thank you all so much for the comments, the kudos, and the subscriptions. You all rock!   
> Hope you enjoy!

The next few days were spent trying to keep the two Steves separate. They didn’t get along too well when they were forced together, and so they tried to restrict the time spent between the two to meal times.  Even then those got pretty tense, with Rogers constantly putting Steve down for being such a wimp.  When Steve had asked if they could spend some time as a family Rogers had actually rolled his eyes.  

“Seriously?  Don’t you have something better to do, like bake a cake or something?” He asked, a deep smirk lacing up his lips.  Natasha shot him a look that told him one more comment like that was going to get her foot planted so far up his ass he tasted leather, and after rolling his eyes Rogers dropped it.  The damage had been done, however, and Steve kept quiet for the rest of the evening, picking at what was on his plate as though he wasn’t hungry, though he’d hardly touched a thing.  Nat’s heart ached and one of her hands rested on his shoulder, squeezing gently.  

“Ignore him,” she told Steve when the pair of them were working on putting dishes away.  Even though he’d roasted a whole damn chicken, complete with fresh bread, corn on the cob, and honey glazed carrots he insisted on doing the dishes he’d dirtied up.  Who said perfect men didn’t exist?  “Rogers is a complete asshole.”

“I know he is,” Steve murmured as he washed the pan in his hands for what must’ve been the third time, his mind elsehwere.  “I’ve been stuck with him ever since I was born; trust me, I understand that what he says is just his way of trying to make himself feel better.  But still I’m sure he’s not the only one who thinks that way.”

“I bet he is.  A little family time wouldn’t go amiss.”  She offered him a sure smile, though if she was honest with herself she had no idea that that meant.  What was considered family time?  For that matter, was what they had a family?  Somedays it certainly felt like it, in the same sense that she imagined she’d want to kill her siblings if she’d had any, because there were some times when she wanted to throttle Stark or strangle Clint.  “What did you have in time?  I’ll help you set it up.  Rogers won’t dare say no to me.”  She promised, reaching over to ruffle Steve’s perfect blond hair.  He just gave a quiet laugh, nearly a giggle.  That was the weirdest thing Nat had ever seen, aside from when she’d caught Rogers swearing.  To see the word ‘fuck’ come out of Steve Rogers’ mouth was . . . well, it was odd alright.  

Still, Steve didn’t look too convinced, and after pondering what she could do to help a new idea clicked into Natasha’s head.  She reached over to take his hand, setting the pot back on the counter to be air dried, and squeezed his fingers with her own.  “Hey, you wanna go somewhere?” She asked, an easy smile falling on her lips.  She had an idea she might know what would make him feel better.  

He flushed at her words, mind going elsewhere by accident and Natasha waved away his spluttering apologies for why he wasn’t like _that_.  

“No, I don’t mean it that way, Steve.”  Natasha gave a quiet laugh.  “No, I mean I know somewhere that we can go to hang out, where you don’t have to worry about Rogers being an ass.  If you’re not too full, I mean.”  

Steve seemed to think that didn’t sound too bad, and a moment later he was all smiles and pulling on an old army jacket he must have fished out of somewhere deep in Shield’s storage.  Or maybe Coulson had held onto it.  He would do something like that.  The idea widened Nat’s grin a little further as she reminded herself to ask the agent about it while she brought Steve downstairs.  She offered to drive, for which Steve was grateful, and they kept the conversation light as she made her way through the city towards the outskirts.  

This ought to make him feel better.

The diner was open for twenty-four hours, and she’d found it while following a target years ago.  The man had loved everything having to do with the forties, not unlike Steve, and Nat had spent many an evening stationed outside, waiting for him to come outside.  The bastard hadn’t lasted ten minutes once she got him alone, but that was what he got for selling weapons to Hydra.  

The building looked straight out of the forties, with the powder blue dresses, the matching blue seats both at the bar near the kitchen and the padded booths.  Steve’s eyes went wide as he saw it and his hand clutched at hers tightly.  His skin all but vibrated with his excitement as the two took a seat at a booth in the very back.  

“This is amazing,” he said, eyes wide as he took it in, doing his best to keep his jaw from gaping.  It was incredibly endearing, Nat had to admit, and she wasn’t sure why she’d never taken Cap here; he would’ve loved it.  Her stomach flipped just a little at the thought of bringing him here after he got fixed.  

Woah.  Not okay.  

She ignored it in favor of looking at the menu, not hungry but desperately wanting a shake.  Something about a diner like that just begged for its patrons to order fattening shakes, greasy burgers and fries so good they nearly killed you, and Nat had no problem obliging with the first and made a mental note to come back when she wasn’t so full.  Everything looked so good, after all.  Steve seemed to be having the same trouble, pointing out how he’d remembered having a particular dish at a diner further on Queens that wasn’t there anymore, or reminiscing about how he’d always wanted to learn how to make something else.  

“We can get you the recipes, y’know,” Nat reminded him, smiling over the top of her menu at him.  He just nodded.  When the waitress came over it was Steve who ordered food as well as a chocolate malt, while Nat just opted for a strawberry.  She hoped it was as good as they said they were, though she doubted it would be terrible.  A place like this didn’t stick around long if the food wasn’t authentic and good, not in New York.  

“How are you still hungry?” She asked Steve with a quiet laugh.  “I saw you eat a good fourth of the chicken yourself, as well as quite a bit more of everything else.”

He shrugged.  “Fast metabolism, I guess.  Same reason alcohol doesn’t work on me; I’m just hungry all the time.”

Well, at least he could cook, and at least Stark was rich enough that they’d never have to worry about Steve eating them all out of house and home.  Strange though, when she thought about it, that she’d never seen Rogers do the same.  Maybe he was just better at sneaking around.  It wouldn’t surprise her.  

“Well, at least it doesn’t go right to your hips,” Natasha teased.  They kept the conversation light and superficial until their food had come, keeping from discussing their fellow Avengers and what was to be done about a family night or more bonding time spent between them until they were certain they wouldn’t be disturbed.  Steve did his best to keep his head down, too, not wanting a repeat of when they went on their walk together.  The man, it turned out, had quite a few ideas for ways to up their time spent bonding, and though he was sure Rogers would veto them all he at least wanted to give it a shot.  Nat had to admit that she rather enjoyed the idea; Tony usually took over any bonding time there might have been, which, nine times out of ten meant either embarrassing Captain, liquor, strippers, or somehow all three were involved.  It was no wonder why Steve was looking for a change.  Nat would’ve slit Tony’s throat by then (or at least punched him in it.)  Maybe that was why she hadn’t been invited.

Hmm.  

“I think a night at the movies sounds like a blast,” Nat told him after he’d finished explaining how he hadn’t really trusted himself to sit down with Stark and watch movies all day long, but he wanted to try it to see what all the hype was about. He remembered black and white movies but he didn’t know how much that had changed.  “We’ve got to catch you up on what you’ve missed.”  She reached over and squeezed his hand, smiling helpfully.  He seemed to flourish under her praise.  

“Well there’s that, and then dancing.  I’ve never been before. Maybe we could take some of the gals out from Shield, and you and Clint can go together?” He suggested, looking excited.  

Nat chuckled. “Not sure Phil would be too happy about that,” she admitted with a quick wink.  “Besides, whatever we do outside of the tower we have to make sure that you and Rogers aren’t seen together.  No one can know there are two of you, remember?”

His face fell a little, having forgotten.  She frowned.  “That doesn’t mean we can’t, but we’d have to do half and half.  But they’re great ideas, Steve. Really great.”

“Well, maybe, would you--I mean could you--do you want to go with me?” He asked, flustered as his face turned bright red.  She let herself smile, watching him scratch the back of his head as his words trailed off.  Her silence only seemed to make him more embarrassed as he started to stammer: “I mean--you don’t have--we don’t have to it’s not a big--.”

“Steve,” she smiled. “Are you asking me out on a date?”  She could hardly believe it, though it was really cute all the same.  

He gave a long, drawn out sigh, face reddening further as he nodded his head quickly.  “Yes.  You’re an awesome gal and I thought, if you and Clint weren’t together, I mean.” He trailed off again with a nervous laugh.  

“Yes.”

“What?”  His eyes shot up to her, growing wide as quarters.  

“Yes.  I’ll go out on a date with you.”  She said with an easy smile.  Her hand reached over to take his and squeeze it once more, and he flipped them so he could squeeze hers back, a big goofy smile spreading on his lips.  She felt her heart swell.  What a sweetheart.  

“Wow, gosh.  I--thanks,” he laughed again.  “That’s really swell--I mean I’ve been wanting to ask you since, well, Manhattan and--.”

His words were cut off just as Nat was about to say something, taken aback by his sudden confession, but the number on the phone was from Shield.  Nat didn’t have the option to ignore it.  

“Romanov,” she said quickly once she’d unlocked the phone.  

“Are you with Steve, Good Cap?”  Fury sounded hopeful.  

“I am, sir.”  

“Good.  Both of you come in.  We caught Loki.”

 

They managed to get back to the base in record time, Steve looking nervous as he and Natasha walked through the halls.  She tried to set a reassuring hand on his shoulder, to tell him that everything would be alright, but she knew better than anyone that false hope was worse than anything else, and no matter how they wanted it to turn out alright it was better to wait it out and see.  

Loki’s hands were being held by his brother when they got to him, though his eyes were alight when he looked from Rogers to Steve.  He was enjoying this, a wide grin spreading over his lips.  

“I’m glad my spell worked.”

“Yeah, a little too well.  Now reverse it,” Fury said, his one eye narrowed as he took in the demi-god.

Loki drew himself up to his full height, and Nat didn’t believe for a moment the apologetic look on his face.  “I’m afraid to say that I cannot.  This spell does not have a counterspell, it can only be undone by time.”

“Time we don’t really have.  What if another lunatic like you comes to try and take over the world?” Fury growled.  

Loki, it seemed, tried not to chuckle, his head cocking to the side.  “Then you have two Captain Americas, is that not preferable?”  Behind him, Thor nudged his brother, growling quietly.  Loki rolled his eyes.  “Right, I forget you don’t like it when your people are not whole, though you employ so many it’s a wonder this place stands at all.  But I do not lie when I say that I cannot undo this spell.  You must get the two to come back together willingly.  They must forsake the freedom from the other that they have now grown accustomed to, and learn to see the world through one another’s eyes.  You should pay me.  How long do you think your Captain America has repressed himself?  How healthy is that for his mental status?”

“Right, well I’ll be sure to send you a check when I see the results,” Fury snarked, rolling his one eye.  He nodded to Thor, who began to tighten his hold on Loki’s wrists.  The demi-god growled as he looked back at his brother.

“So crude.  I tell the truth!  You can search all nine realms for a solution but I know not of one.  They will come together in time, or not at all.  There’s nothing more that I can do.”

“So we’ve got two Captain Americas until they decide to have a heart to heart and kiss and make up?” Tony asked, his arms folded over his chest, the light blue of the arc reactor pulling Loki’s gaze first before he brought his eyes up to Tony’s.  The scientist suppressed a shudder at the brief look of hunger that passed over the man’s face.  

“Yes.  Only when they can come together will there be harmony between the two sides, though perhaps if you allow me access to my scepter--.”

“The Artifact is within Shield care and you will not be permitted to touch it.”  Fury’s voice was a deep growl, his eyes narrowed.  “No matter what.”

“No matter if it helps to bring the two together?”

“I’ll take my chances with those two talking it out over you going crazy again.  They can at least be rational.”

Loki laughed, his head tipping backwards.  Fury told Thor to put him in the holding cell they’d prepared in the very basement of the tower, thick walls engraved with runes provided by Thor would keep his power under check while the security cameras in the corners of the room would ensure that he was never out of Shield’s sight.  They’d taken no chances when they’d brought him in the first time after Manhattan, they’d do the same now.  

Throughout the whole speech Rogers and Steve had passed quick looks at the other, as if they thought the others couldn’t see them, but Nat had, and categorized them.  The two were trying to plan it out, trying to figure out how to make this work between them, though she doubted it would go very far.  There was no way that they’d give up what they wanted most: freedom.  It was what their whole fought for, after all--the freedom of the oppressed, and Rogers had been very repressed.  They kept quiet, however, as the team shuffled into the living room together to sit and talk it out.  Nat poised herself on the edge of the couch, Steve to her left on the cushioned part.  He offered to move over so she could sit but she refused with a small smile.  What a gentleman.  

“So.  How do we get Spangly back?” Tony asked, voice cutting through the silence as he looked around to them all.  Bruce gave a quick shrug while Clint looked just as lost as Phil did beside him, the pair exchanging glances to see if the other had any plans.  Nothing.  Tony sighed.  “Well, look at what Loki said: get them to come together.”

“Us.”  Steve murmured.  

“Yeah, don’t talk about us as if we’re not in the room,” Rogers growled, his eyes narrowing as he turned his gaze on Stark.  This time the scientist did let a little shiver roll up his spine and his gaze turned lustful for a moment.  

Then it clicked.  Natasha could see it in his eyes before anything else, before the gasp that meant he’d found something.  

“I got it!  Rogers--we turn you into a fifties housewife, and Steve . . . well, we deflower you and show you the beauty of the debauched.”  He grinned, rubbing his hands together as his eyes lit up.  “It’s the only way.  If you both learn what you’re missing--.”

“No.”  Rogers scowled.

“I agree,” Steve said, voice even quieter as he tried to sink into the couch behind him.  “I don’t want to be de . . . I’m happy with how I am.”  

“You don’t know what you’re missing,” Rogers said, looking over at his counter part, one eyebrow cocked as he looked over at Natasha.  She ignored him, brain too busy moving as she reclined back on the couch.

“That’s just it,”  Natasha said for the first time.  “Neither of you do.  It’s the only lead we can follow.”

“But I don’t want to.”  Steve said as he looked up at her, his eyes wide and pitiful.  “Don’t you like me the way I am?”  

Oh, really?  He had to play that card?  Natasha sighed and nodded, leaning over to press her lips to his temple.  The astounded looks weren’t lost on her when she pulled away, but she kept her eyes on Steve’s.  None of the others had seen her show even an ounce of this sentiment.  

“Of course I do, Steve.  I like you no matter which way you are, but this is what’s best.  I know you both want your freedom from being in the same body, but I know that you both also, somewhere deep inside, want what’s best for everyone.  This is what’s best for everyone, what’s going to keep the world safe.  We need you both, but we need you to work together for the good of others as well as yourself.”  

Her words seemed to do the trick.  Though he scowled the whole while, Rogers muttered that he agreed: “But I’m not cooking.  No how, no way.”  
“Good,” Natasha said, her tone a little more clipping than she’d have liked.  “Then I have mending you can start on, and dishes, and cleaning.  Want to start there?”

Before he could retort Steve took Natasha’s hand in his and squeezed it once again.  His eyes were set with resolve when he finally looked up to meet her, and she smiled when he brought his lips to the back of her hand.  “Alright.  I’ll try it.”  

“Good!”  It was Tony who was grinning now. “But I call one last round with Rogers before we try and turn him into a goodie-goodie.”


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Eek! Sorry this took so long to get written! I promise I haven't forgotten about this fic, and I hope that the update makes the wait worth while?   
> Either way thank you all so much for your continued support, your comments, kudos--everything. They really make me smile <3

To Natasha’s displeasure she had to go off on a mission to Russia the following day, and Steve seemed just as reluctant to let her go.  He held onto her hand as he walked her down to the jet bay, worrying at his bottom lip as she stood in front of him, preparing to get going.  

“I’ll be back before you know it,” she offered, stepping up on her toes to kiss his cheek.  They hadn’t worked up to more than that, and while she knew eventually that she had to--how had Stark put it?  Deflower him?--she wasn’t about to fuck him and dump him like she might’ve done with Rogers.

Had done with Rogers.  Whoops.  Tony wasn’t the only one who wanted a last go with the man.  

“I just get worried that you don’t have good enough back up.  What with Clint in Austria--.”

“I told you I’m not even going to be in the field.  I just need to sit around and translate for a little bit, try and listen in for a few key words, and report back.  It’s not a bad mission,” she said, steering clear of telling him she’d be alright.  That never ended well.  

“Okay.”  He didn’t look consoled, and she took his hand in hers to squeeze it.  He brought it up to his lips. “I’m worried about being left here, too.”

“Hey, Tony won’t do anything to you that you don’t want him to.  He knows I’ll chop his favorite appendage off if he does,” Nat said, her eyes darkening as she remembered issuing the threat.  The man had been eyeing Steve as though he were a particularly sugary piece of cake waiting to be devoured, and Nat wasn’t having any of that.  If anyone was going to devour Steve it would be her; Stark could content himself with turning Rogers innocent.  Not near as fun, but she was sure Jarvis would have memorable footage to show her when she got back.

It almost made leaving bearable, but then Steve gave her one last, tight hug and pulled away with such reluctance that her tongue glued itself to the top of her mouth for a moment.  How the hell was she supposed to leave him now?  

But leave she did.  She’d be staying in a small hostel just a hundred feet away from the restaurant she’d be watching, and while it was nicely furnished and everything, and she didn’t have to bunk with anyone but a rather agreeable female Shield agent named Jessica, she couldn’t help but miss her bed.  Steve had just started sleeping with her at night, his body soft and moldable as she curled herself around him every night, sighing in content when he would hold her tighter, or kiss her cheek in the morning as he murmured for her to get up.  

A lump rose in her throat and so she pushed the memories away.  She could live them again once she got home, and if that didn’t give her a hell of an incentive to return she didn’t know what would.  

As she stayed up on the rooftops, watching the man through a pair of binoculars and her mind already miles away, she marveled at just how quickly she’d grown attached to Steve.  She’d been thinking about how she didn’t want him to get changed back, how she wished he could stay the way he was forever so she’d always know which man she was talking to; the one who wanted to jump her bones and tear everything to pieces, or the one who was so good it was amazing such a person existed.  

What the hell was she supposed to do now?

She tried throwing herself into her work, listening as intently as she could to the portly man on the other side of the glass a couple hundred miles away go on about his plans for the Red Room’s rebirth.  She didn’t recognize him, and judging by the way he was talking he had absolutely no idea what was going on, or what the room was even about.  He seemed to think it a whore house, and while that might have been true at some point--because each girl was taught how to use their body as the greatest weapon they had--it was nowhere near accurate enough for her to give pause to what his words really meant.  She told Fury that much when she called him at night, waking him up.  

“Romanov, what the hell did you do now?”

“You sent me on a pointless mission; I’m heading back home tomorrow.”

“What’d you find out?”

She recited the information with a sigh, then her reasoning for not taking it seriously, about how her experience was screaming that this man had nothing to do with the Red Room because, well, he was an idiot.  Not to mention, any senior official wouldn’t be seen out in the streets of Russia; there were far too many men and women he’d have pissed off to chance it.  Why the hell did she waste her time with this mission?  Then again she, alone, would have been able to tell whether or not it was true at first glance, and it had been the right thing to do to take the time out of her schedule to get it over with.  

She’d definitely been spending too much time with Steve.  

Either way, Fury sent her home immediately, leaving Jessica with a team of trained specialists to bring the other man in.  Idiot or not he still had his hands dirty, the first reason he’d been put on the watch list.  Nat was bouncing up and down--out of excitement?  Nerves?  Terror at what the hell she’d find?--the whole journey back, barely able to keep her hands from shaking as she steered the jet back home.  Amazingly, the tower seemed to still be in one piece.  What with Loki still being around, and the two Steve Rogers being forced to cohabitate and get to know one another she nearly expected another Manhattan situation on their hands, but no.  Nothing had fallen apart, physically at least, while she was gone.  

She was back at the tower late afternoon, having done everything in her power to hurry through the debriefing process and going over the details with Nick before going back.  “Jarvis, what’d I miss?” She asked, irritated with the way she sounded more concerned and desperate for information than her normal cool and collected self.  She’d definitely been spending too much time with Steve.

“Nothing too important, Miss. Romanov. Rogers is in the kitchen and Steve is in the training room.”

She made a beeline for the latter, then, though she didn’t want to stay for too long.  She was sure that going to the kitchen would be just as entertaining, but she didn’t want Steve to think that she was avoiding him.  She, well, she cared a great deal about him and what he thought, and the revelation was enough to stop her in her steps for a moment.  The last person she’d cared for this much had left her, died in a mission decades ago and had led her to give herself, wholeheartedly and without care, to the Red Room’s Super Soldier training program.  If she lost Steve, or even Cap when--if--he got back together.  She swallowed hard and clenched her fists.  It wasn’t the time to think of that.  

Steve was laying waste to a training dummy donated to Shield by Stark, who’d found that he was hardly using it, though by the looks of it it didn’t seem that anyone would be using it for much longer.  The limbs, which were supposed to be irremovable, were in fact lying on the ground, twitching as the rest of the electricity circuited through the system, while Steve now aimed the blows towards the head.  It popped clean off in half a minute.  Nat clamped down on a shudder as she remembered all the times she and Cap had been sparring.  She could take a hit and keep giving but he was a lot stronger and more ferocious than he let on.  Strange to see it from Steve, though.  What had they done to him in forty-eight short hours that had wound him up so much?

“Hey,” she started, her voice just loud enough to catch his attention.  “Bad day at the office?”

He didn’t jump at the intrusion to his credit, but he stopped what he was doing immediately to grin at her.  “Hey!  I thought you’d be gone for some time,” he said, pulling her into his arms quickly.  She smiled, relaxing in his hold, as if her body had been waiting for it, had been held taut until he was able to help her find release.  

“The mission was a joke,” she murmured against his skin, his arms warm and solid around her.  She breathed him in, smiling in spite of herself.  “The guy had absolutely no helpful information so I’m back.  How’s everything been going here?”  He seemed fine, in one piece and all that, and her smile widened to find him mirroring it.  

“Fine.  Really well, actually.  Rogers is up in the kitchen if you want to go see?” He asked, leaning in to kiss her cheek.  “He and Tony have been trying to learn how to bake, and even though I offered them help they refused.”  He gave the quietest of laughs.  It must have been hilarious, and Nat nodded quickly.  

“Yes, please show me.  I’ve gotta see this.”  She let out a quick cackle, and as he threaded his fingers with hers to lead her to the kitchen.  Jarvis was patiently reading out instructions from what must’ve been a recipe as Stark and Rogers both looked, confused at the ingredients.  The mass in the bowl was brown, lumpy, and while it might have smelled like chocolate if they’d done it right they’d overdone it and--.

“Is that chili powder?” Steve asked, his eyes going wide.  Natasha tried not to snort.

“Yeah.  We’re making a hot chocolate cake--it sounded like fun,” Tony said, puffing out his chest a little indignantly.  The way he probably saw it, Nat thought as she and Steve took a seat near the island where the other two men were working, if he could master rocket science and create a suit and a power source to keep him and said suit alive at the same time he probably thought baking was going to be a breeze.  It was just science after all.  

How wrong he was.  More than once Steve and Nat caught them trying to add more sugar than strictly necessary, as if thinking it would balance everything out, leaving out the baking soda entirely, and trying to throw in chocolate chips and pieces of candy when they didn’t think it looked right.  All the while Steve had wrapped his arm around Natasha’s shoulders and she was leaning into his touch, grinning.  This was going to be hilarious.  Stark looked over to ask her about the mission as the cake was baking, the timer set for forty or so minutes, and she explained what she’d already told Steve about it, before asking the twins how their bonding activities were going.  

“I’m cooking, aren’t I?” Rogers growled, his eyes flashing with an annoyance that made Natasha’s eyebrows rise.  Even more surprising was his apology that followed right after.  So they had been spending more time together if he was picking up on some of Steve’s better traits like Nat was.  The good twin, however, didn’t speak of any progress he’d made.  

“I haven’t done  a darn thing.”

“Damn.”

“What?” He looked over at her, as though expecting her to be disappointed.  

“You haven’t done a damn thing.  Listen to Rogers,” Stark instructed.  “It’ll help.  Hopefully.”  How were they supposed to know?  Nat nodded and kissed his cheek, not missing the way that Rogers’ eyes followed the movement.  Was he getting jealous, really?  She could read it in the corners of his eyes, twitching the way she’d seen Cap’s do when Tony was trying his patience, or else in the way his left fingers jolted, straightening out before curving naturally once more .She filed it away to be analyzed and discussed with the soldier later, offering him a small smile instead.  “And how are your endevors in sewing and cleaning coming?”

“Not well.  I can’t get the handle on sewing,” he admitted, looking away as he rubbed the back of his neck . Steve offered to show him, and both Tony and Nat locked eyes for a moment.  That was significant, even if the other two men didn’t notice anything different about it.  At least they were willing to try working together.  

As predicted, the cake came out dense and nearly rock hard.  Even if it hadn’t been tougher than a brick, the chili powder was overpowering, so that the small bite that Natasha did manage to get down burned her mouth, not an easy feat to accomplish.  

“Well, I don’t think we’ll be able to sell you off to any men anytime soon looking for someone to cook,” Stark snarked as he gulped down his third glass of milk, sweating from the heat of it.  “Your prowess in the bedroom is about all we can offer to any interested suitors.”

“Shut up, Stark,” Rogers growled, his eyes narrowed as they locked onto the scientist.  “As I recall you weren’t exactly any help yourself.  You wanted to put in all that chili powder.”

“And what a mistake it was.”

The two bantered on for some more time before Steve stepped in, ready to make dinner.  He pulled Rogers along side him, showing him how to go through the basics of cutting up vegetables and how to season the steaks he’d pulled out of the fridge a few minutes ago.  Stark took a seat beside Natasha and for some time neither of them spoke, letting the two twins work in tandem to try and fix something decent to eat.  It was strange, Natasha thought, not just the situation because she’d gotten over that, but how, well, compliant Rogers was becoming.  As though he was genuinely trying to do this, while Steve seemed to be resisting it at every turn.  Perhaps it got easier: the more they gave in the less difficult it was to remain in their old habits.  It would make sense why Steve had hardly changed when Rogers was clearly trying his best to.  

But why?

She added it to her present list of questions to be answered, standing up to chop up lettuce, tomatoes, and carrots for a salad.  It was the least she could do.  Meanwhile, Stark was picking apart the cake, unable to help himself.  He just really liked chocolate, he defended through a mouthful of it.  “And besides--I put a lot of good candy in this, and dammit I’m gonna eat it.”  Even if he went through about half a gallon of milk in the process.  Nat growled at him that he wasn’t going to have an appetite for dinner but he ignored her, as per the norm.  She just rolled her eyes.  

“Fine, but I’m not taking care of you when you’re sick.”

“That’s fine.  Rogers will, won’t you baby?” Stark asked with a smirk.  The man opposite him, holding onto a very sharp knife, narrowed his eyes.  

“Shut up, Stark.”

 

Dinner was a quick, quiet affair, made slightly awkward by Loki’s presence.  Thor had asked that his brother be allowed to at least come out for meals, and the others decided that they would rather deal with the trickster three times a day than listen to Thor beg them for any longer.  That, and despite being a man of over six feet and built like a rock the man had some of the best puppy dog eyes Natasha had ever seen.  No one had the heart to tell him no.  The exiled prince watched them all with thinly veiled interest, watching how the two twins interacted with the others as well as with the other, almost as if he was conducting an experiment.  

“I am telling you I might be able to reverse this spell if you give me my scepter,” he said when Rogers growled for Loki to leave him the hell alone.  “It would be painless, I believe.  Just like pushing water back together after having separated it into two puddles.”

Steve didn’t look so certain about that.  “You can’t just expect us to go together unwillingly and for our . . . our normal body and mind to be alright with it.”  He sounded as though he’d been thinking about it for some time.  “We’re two different people in the same body; it would ruin Captain America with our constant bickering and demand to be heard.  It’s not just something you can easily undo.”

Nothing else was said on the subject, though Nat thought he’d addressed it rather well.  So why was he so reluctant to liken himself to Rogers if he knew it was necessary?  

Though she offered to do dishes the other men wouldn’t let her; Bruce and Steve took to the task with a surprised vigor, the latter having a couple questions, it seemed, that he wanted to talk about with Bruce.  It clicked as she watched them talking, their voices quiet, and Steve glancing every so often back at Rogers, who was engaged in a conversation with Clint about his newest arrows.  Steve must have thought himself like Bruce, with a counterpart that was dangerous and often reckless, not thinking about who got hurt so long as he got what he wanted.  Except Rogers wasn’t dangerous, from what Natasha could see., but Steve wouldn’t think that.  He had the image in his head that the other half of him was less than admirable and therefore a monster, a beast that needed to be tamed and locked up just as Bruce had thought when she’d first met him.  

Her train of thought was broken a moment later as an arm pressed itself to her elbow, squeezing so she looked over into Roger’s bright blue eyes.  

“Can I talk to you in private?” He asked, voice quiet and the smile on his lips actually, surprisingly, sincere.  She was taken aback by it for a moment, rendered speechless and so nodded her head instead before following him out of the room.  He led her back to hers, sure that no one would miss them there, and once the door was closed he pushed her up against the wall and kissed her hard.  Both of his hands cupped the sides of her face and his hips ground hard against hers.  He took advantage of her mouth opening with shock to further deepen the kiss, coaxing the softest of moans from her lips.

“I missed you,” he muttered, pulling away from her so he could breathe.

“It’s been two days,” she gasped, exasperated.  What was it with these boys and over exaggerating?  Seriously, she hadn’t been gone that long.

“No.  You’re always with Steve; I never get you to myself.  I’ve been trying to make a good impression, tried to be a good boy,” he growled quietly, his fingers hooking on her pants and pulling her close again.  “But he’s the only one you see.  And I really like being with Stark, but I really like being with you, too, but he never lets me.”  His fingers fumbled with the zipper and button of her jeans but she stilled his hands a moment later, eyes flashing.

“You can’t say that you miss me and you’re mad at another guy for having my attention just because you want to fuck me,” she growled, flattening her hands on his chest to push him away.  “Maybe I like being with Steve because he respects me for who I am, not just for having a nice ass.”

That wasn’t what Rogers was expecting, as evident by the small gap between his lips as he processed her words.  “Who said that I was only looking for sex?”

“You didn’t have to say it when all you’ve done since professing that you missed me was shove your tongue down my throat and try and get into my pants,” she reminded him, voice going icy.  “What the hell do you want me to think, Rogers?”

“Well maybe if you’d take some time away from your new pet and give me a chance to talk to you we wouldn’t be here.”

“Then stop trying to jump my bones every chance you get.  I’m not just a fuck buddy, I’m a partner on your team, and you’ll respect me as that and as a woman who has no problem kicking your ass if you try anything funny with me again.” She pointed a finger into his chest, pressing until she saw one of his eyes twitch with the discomfort.  “Now, if that’s all you want them I’m not interested.  You can take your years of sexual repression out on someone else.”

He caught her wrist before she could move away, though, pulling her back to him.  “That’s not all that I want from you,” he murmured, looking down, then back up at her through his lashes.  For a moment she swore she saw Steve peeking out from under there.  “You . . . you know what it’s like to try and change.  To be one way and realize that you have to be another way, even if that’s the opposite of what you’ve always been.  Right?”

Her feet felt as though they were going to sink through the floor and she wetted her lips before turning back to Rogers.  His face was heavily guarded but the way he wrapped one arm around his middle, the way his eyes couldn’t really meet hers told her easily enough how insecure he was.  She sighed.  Yes, she knew.  She knew all too well how it felt to have someone want you to change, to believe that you could do it, when you weren’t anywhere near sure that it was possible.  She knew what it was like to have people depending on you to be different, to alter yourself as though it was as easy as slipping into a new outfit, and she’d gotten good at repressing it until that evil, that darkness that had been instilled in her could be harnessed for the good, or at least a better purpose than the one she’d been given before.  

“Yes, Rogers, I do.”

“Then can you help me?  The others don’t understand it.  Stark does just a little, and Bruce maybe more than the others--but he and Steve have hit it off since you’d left, so he doesn’t know how to help anymore.  Well, not me at least.”  There was a pause as Rogers swallowed audibly, shifting his feet, the confident, go-getter of a man sucked up in a moment of vulnerability.  “I just need to figure out what I’m supposed to do, because Steve’s not doing anything else. You can see that as well as I can, so I guess I have to step up and do it.”

He was doing a hell of a job changing as it was, Natasha noted to herself as she watched him speak.  To admit that he had a problem he couldn’t fix, to ask for help and come out like that, well, if she hadn’t seen it happen she wouldn’t have believed it. Pity and hope intertwined and blossomed in the pit of Natasha’s stomach as she raised a hand to Roger’s shoulder and squeezed it, getting his attention.  

“Why didn’t you come out and say that?” She asked, a chuckle framing her words.  

He flashed her a smile that was all teeth, his confidence peeking back out for a moment.  “Hey, I thought I’d take advantage of what might be my last chance to be alone with you for some time.  I mean, if we fix this spell or whatever Loki did it won’t be me anymore.  Well, not entirely.”  He paused.  “That and you’re always in a better mood after I’ve fucked you and made you come a couple times.”

The brash words sent a brief shiver down her spine and she did her best to disguise it with a laugh.  There was some truth to his words, she supposed.  “Well, how about we talk first and then we can do something a little more fun.  It’s better to end on a high note, isn’t it?”

“Can’t we just have sex twice?  It’s better to get while the getting’s good rather than let it go to waste.”

“Watch it, soldier.”

“Yes ma’am.”  He was smiling and winked at her once more before she led him to her bed so they could sit and chat.  

 

Later that night, as she curled up in his embrace, cheeks still burning and heart still thudding hard in her chest, she marveled over the position these two men had put her in.  She knew she cared about Cap; he was a part of her team, after all, and her team had become more of a family than anything she’d ever had before.  But now, seeing these two parts of Cap at their most vulnerable when the man she had known was always so strong and so powerful . . . what was she going to do when that came back and the two she’d started to really care--if she believed in love she might even call it that--disappeared, replaced with a man she wasn’t sure she’d ever be able to look in the eye again?  As she looked up at Rogers, already drifting off, his face lax and peaceful the way only a good romp could leave one with, she felt her throat tighten and supposed that, when the day came that Cap came back she’d deal with it then.  It was too much to consider then when sleep was already making the corners of her vision fuzzy and she didn’t want to confuse whatever emotion was growing in her gut with something it couldn’t be.  

 


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I couldn't help it; this just needed to be written =]   
> Hope you enjoy! <3 I should also warn you that this chapter, in particular is unbeta'd, and that I'm absolutely terrible at writing full-group fight sequences, so I hope it doesn't detract too much!   
> Also--if you are adverse to decently graphic sex scenes, I'd skip until the first page break. Just a warning.

How she got there wasn’t the point, and right then she couldn’t have found something to care less about.  The tall man in front of her was smirking as he herded her back into a room, this one dimly lit though she couldn’t see the light source, and then into someone’s chest, eliciting a gasp from her lips.  Strong arms wrapped around her waist, holding her fast as another hand came to turn her head to the side and Rogers’ lips met hers.  Steve’s were somewhere on her neck, biting and nipping gently as he worked, his body pressed hard up against hers.  She could feel how badly he wanted her--they wanted her--on either side of her hips and it made her knees weak.  Seeming to guess that, Steve was the first to break contact, pulling away from Nat with a small groan of displeasure as he lifted her away from Rogers and up into his arms.  She wrapped her own around his neck as they fused their lips together, his feet moving them towards the bed with Rogers just behind.  With Nat’s eyes closed she could hear the soft whoosh of clothing hitting the floor, and as she was laid down on the bed she opened her eyes to see a very naked and very ready Rogers grinning over her.  It wasn’t the typical “I’m-Captain-America-Defender-Of-The-Weak!” smile that seemed to charm the pants off of everyone.  No, this was sinful, dirty, and it nearly melted her panties off right then and there.  God, she’d have that image seared in her brain for the rest of her life if she had the choice, never wanting to forget the way his eyes seemed to eat her up, devouring her from head to toe as he undressed and fucked her with his gaze alone.  She was wetter than she’d ever been and her clothing was scorching her skin, so she hurried to remove them, fingers fumbling over the button and zipper to her pants until they were ripped clean off by Rogers.  Her shirt was the next casualty, Steve standing just behind Rogers, taking his time to remove and fold his clothes so they wouldn’t crease, while Rogers was taking no prisoners with Nat’s own.  Her shirt, bra, and panties were in tatters by the time they hit the floor and Rogers wasted no time in looming over her on the center of the bed.  He winked, then his mouth fastened onto one of her breasts, tongue flicking out to tease the hard nub he found there.  Nat’s back arched off the bed, her hand sinking into his usually perfectly styled hair and pulling so hard he groaned at the pain that spiked through his skull.  

Before she had the time to say anything else another mouth fastened onto her second breast, though this one was gentle, all sweet and loving and she turned her head to see Steve smiling up at her through his lashes, cheeks tinged with pink.  Oh God.  She pulled his head away to kiss him hard on the lips, tongue shoved into his mouth as she tried to convey just how much she loved and wanted him right then while Rogers’ lips were moving lower and lower, teasing her sides by nipping at the sensitive skin, then her inner thigh, and finally.

“Shit!” She broke away from Steve with a shout as Rogers licked one long stripe up her already wet slit.  Her body trembled and she looked down at the man beneath her legs, now swirling his tongue over her clit with such precision it was scary.  The man was every bit the perfect soldier in the bedroom as he was in the field, knowing which weak points to hit so that Natasha was a moaning mess on the bed in a matter of seconds.  She pulled Steve atop her so he was straddling her shoulders and before he could so much as protest she had his cock in her mouth, tonguing the slit at the top before rolling the tip around in her mouth and groaning at how good he felt and tasted.  Steve was whining and sweating atop her, one hand moving nervously to lace his fingers through her red hair as her tongue began to emulate the same movements that Rogers was making between her legs.  

“Ah,” Steve gasped as Nat took him all in inch by inch, testing her gag reflex and finding he felt perfect when he filled her mouth.  “That’s my girl.  Oh my gosh Nat, that feels so good,” he moaned.  Her own climax overcame her not a minute or two later, taking her by surprise as her toes curled and her fingers grabbed a hold of Steve’s hips so she could swallow him whole, his cock preventing her from screaming as her body tensed.  He whimpered, head tipped back and eyes cast shut, mouth falling open as he reveled in the feel, whispering “my girl” and her name over and over again, as though to prove that she really was his.  She wouldn’t have minded it at all.  

But that wasn’t all, oh no.  While Rogers kissed the insides of her thighs he was also moving, leaning away from Nat to grab something behind him, and it wasn’t too long after she was coming down, her whole body relaxed, that she felt one finger slowly pressing into her ass, her legs having been lifted onto Rogers’ shoulders to open her up wider.  She shivered, glad she was already so relaxed as it breached her backside and Rogers worked it in as fast as he dared.  A second finger, then a third joined, all the while Nat’s mouth barely left Steve’s cock, and though the man had the stamina of a god he looked as though he might be ready to finish any time.  That wouldn’t do at all.  With a wet pop she disconnected and grinned up at him, pulling him down so he could kiss her hard on the lips.  He returned it with fervor, not even complaining as she moved him onto his back on the bed, removing her legs from where they were hooked around Rogers’ neck so she could get on all fours above Steve.  Rogers looked over to his twin, who seemed to get the message even through his hazy, lust filled eyes, because he repositioned Nat atop him, Rogers removing his hand with a slight groan from Nat.  She wasn’t ready to give that up yet, though!  

“Would you--I mean, Natasha can you--?” He blushed furiously, looking down and scratching the back of his head.  Nat looked between he and Rogers for a moment, surprised that they’d orchestrated this, but she nodded and positioned herself so that she could sink down onto his cock, taking her time to enjoy it, and to make sure he did, too (though if the noises he was making were any sign she’d say she did a damn good job).  She groaned, head tipping backwards and her fingers tangling with his as he filled her perfectly.  She was given a minute or so to adjust before she was pushed down to lay atop Steve, Rogers’ hand gentle but commanding as he rubbed her back.  

“Relax babe.”  There was that damn beautiful accent, the words pulled and stretched in such an unfamiliar way that it sent shivers racing up Nat’s spine.  

However, it did nothing to prepare her for what came next.  With Steve already inside her, Rogers managed to seat his cock at the entrance to her ass and slowly, oh so slowly, push in.  The burn and stretch was delicious and spread throughout her whole nervous system as though she really was on fire, and with a quiet whimper she did her best to relax and stay still until he was completely seated inside her.  The feel of the two men within her was nearly enough to make her come as it was, but when they started moving?  It was all she could do to not lose control, her forehead pressed to Steve’s chest as his arms wrapped around her body.  When he would pull out, Rogers would push in, the pair of them working her body like it was a well oiled machine, hitting every right spot within her so her vision went white.  She felt the edge of her orgasm coming, threatening to wipe out every other sense with the swell of oncoming pleasure, and she was screaming their names as she--.

 

 

“Fuck! Nat, there’s something going on--c’mon!” Rogers said, shaking her shoulders and ripping her from the best part of her dream.  Her eyes shot open, locking on him and feeling the heat between her legs intensify.

That was a dream?  Not okay.  She groaned and looked around, mouth open to ask what was happening when the ground shifted, the sound of sirens and screams finally getting her attention.  Oh.  Without another question she sprang into action, standing quickly to pull on the suit she’d hung over her desk chair from yesterday’s mission, then her bites after that, and finally she was tugging on her boots when the ground shook again.  Jarvis was shouting over the system that the Avengers were to assemble downstairs as soon as possible.  Loki had gotten a hold of his scepter, as it turned out, having charmed his way with one of the Shield agents until they’d let him down into the Archives, where the weapon was being used for testing.  

To say he was wreaking havoc was an understatement.  

New York had still been on the mend as it was, and now with Loki determined to create even more chaos it was in a complete state of panic and collapse.  The team assembled, Rogers in a different suit designed so that they could tell the two men fighting apart, this one all blue with a white star on the center and three stripes running horizontally across his chest and loaded to the teeth with guns and a back-up, prototype shield Stark had been working on.  Thank God he’d been prepared for something like this, though Nat had initially thought he was just trying to impress Rogers.  Well, it worked.  As it was, however, the two were bickering over which direction they initially thought best to take.  

This wasn’t going to end well, and they were running out of time.  Thor growled that he’d be the one to try and take on his brother, though the others weren’t too happy, and if they tried to yell at Hulk one more time to keep him from going after the Giants until they had a plan, Nat was sure he was going to start smashing allies and enemies alike.

“Enough,” she growled finally.  “Rogers.  What’s the plan?”  He was the tactician after all, the fighter, and she ignored Steve’s hurt look in favor of getting their asses in gear.  Loki had picked a hell of a morning to interrupt her dreams.  

“Alright.  Thor, what are the weaknesses of these guys?” Stark asked, taking advantage of the first silence that had fallen over them.  Fire was the big one--it would make them shrink down to size, essentially melt them, and Nat growled.  Great, that left her guns useless, and she would rely on her stings to at least knock them out.  Bludgeoning them might work, too, depending on the strength of the Jotun, and if they could shoot enough times to get the bullet to penetrate their heart it might also work to at least slow them down, but their skin was thick and they were burly fighters, quick to anger.  Not to mention they weren’t allowed to touch them, else they would get extreme frostbite.  

They hardly had time after that to discuss anything else, the giants wisening up to their position.  Rogers quickly called out for Hawkeye to go up top and rain fire on them (“Thank God for incendiary arrows,” Clint had said with a wide grin.  “Let’s see how the bastard likes them this time.”) while Hulk was to do his best to smash the hell out of whatever ones he came across.  The green fighter didn’t hang around much longer after that.  Stark was to set up a fire perimeter around the city to try and keep them trapped in--they’d worry about the damages later--then use whatever tech he had to set them aflame, while Rogers and Steve would keep it on the ground.  

“What about the civilians?” Steve demanded, eyes hard.  

“There isn’t any time--we’ll get anyone we can out but once that perimeter goes up there’s not much else we can do.  Containment is our top priority.  Nat, I want you to go after Loki, too,” Rogers said, and though Thor was about to object Nat smirked.  Good.  She was going to rip him a new one.  “You’ve got the speed and he won’t expect you.”  

“Give me a lift Thunder boy,” Nat said, stepping closer to Thor.  The god clenched his jaw but nodded and as they all separated he wrapped an arm around her waist.  They were gone, soaring through the air, moments later, tracking down the trickster who was currently preoccupied with leveling the Chrysler building.  

The bastard--Nat liked that building!  She waited until Thor had his attention, the two of them grappling with the other, before stepping in and throwing her bites at him.  The electricity took him off guard, though she was sure he was used to much worse, and his hesitation was all she needed to run up and land a kick to his jaw, feeling it dislocate beneath the force of her heel.  He stumbled back, allowing Thor to crash Mjolnir into the god’s chest and send him flying backwards.  

Why he didn’t just lay the damn thing atop Loki Natasha had no idea, and she was about to say so before she leapt out of the way to avoid a beam of energy to the chest.  What was more they were garnering attention from some of the nearer Jotuns, Stark’s perimeter not setup yet, so as Thor and Loki battled it out Nat was furiously emptying clip after clip into the oncoming giants.  It was hardly doing a thing.  

“Thor!” She shouted, feeling doubt creep into her bones.  Maybe Rogers’ plan wasn’t so good after all.  The distraction was all it took, and even though Thor summoned lightning enough to take out the oncoming fighters it left him vulnerable to his brother. A vulnerability Loki capitalized on when he slammed the side of his scepter into his brother’s head, then pointed the tip at his chest to blast him backwards.  

The god turned his mad, power crazed eyes onto Natasha and his lips spread wide in a grin.  “I believe I made some promises to you some months before,” he growled as he stepped closer, looking her up and down slowly.  She swallowed hard, tipping her chin up.  Her guns would be useless against him, as she well knew from Manhattan; the man would just shrug them off, and her bites weren’t nearly strong enough, which left her with few options.  

She stumbled backwards, eyes growing wide as she fought off tears, her body already trembling.  “You wouldn’t.”

“Wouldn’t I?  To the victor go the spoils, and as I see no other rising up as champion I believe that makes you mine to do with as I wish.”  He was in front of her in the space of a heartbeat and his foot sank into her gut, kicking her backwards so that she flew a couple feet before landing on her back, body burning.  Damn his strength!  It wasn’t another minute until he was in front of her again, laughing as he tried to sit up.  His hand flew to grip her throat and squeezed it as he picked her up off the ground.  She choked, scratching at his hands as she tried to breathe.  “Now.  Beg for your life you pathetic waste,” he snarled, his face growing closer to hers.  “I want to see how pretty a picture your tongue can paint without oxygen.”

So she begged, scrambling for words as she struggled to breathe, all the while making him smirk and laugh to see her so weak and so frail beneath his fingertips.  He raised her up further, his eyes fixed on hers and his mouth parted to speak when she revealed the small knife she’d pulled from her suit in her attempt to pry his fingers away from her throat, and jammed the blade through the leather of his jacket and into the soft space between his neck and collarbone.  It wouldn’t have killed him, hell she doubted she could, but he gave a howl of pain and surprise as he released her.  She sucked in air greedily before roundhouse kicking him in the chest.  It felt like hitting a brick wall, foot aching from hitting the solid mass, but at least he moved backwards, fingers painted with blood as he removed the dagger.  She ducked low to avoid it being thrown back at her, his aim just as deadly as hers, and her bites skittered across the ground to shock him once more.  Another knife was thrown, this time from Natasha’s hand, and it sunk into his gut, the only soft spot she could think of reaching at that time, trying to fight off her body’s need to collapse.

Thor came to just in time to see the blade sink into his brother’s skin, and though the wound wouldn’t be fatal he still shouted in his surprise.  

“Then get him out of here,” Natasha snarled, her voice hoarse and raspy from the lack of oxygen.  She’d have significant bruises there in an hour, but her mind was racing to where the other Avengers were.  They hadn’t had time to put comms in, and without much else to go on she half ran half limped back towards the action.  As planned there was a box of fire keeping the Jotuns contained, she realized as she drew closer to it, unable to get past the blaze, but it looked as if the fight was at least going well.  At least Hulk was having a good time, using one of the giants as a whip as he swung its twenty-feet long body in the air and crashed it into its fellow giants, knocking back and into the flames.  They melted--literally melted--in moments, screaming all the while, the noise drowned out only by Hulk’s savage cry of victory.  

Nat reminded herself once more never to get on his bad side.  

 

It had taken them the better part of the morning and afternoon, but by the time Thor had disappeared with Loki in hand, the man bound and paler than before on account of how much blood he’d lost, Nat could barely feel a thing.  Steve wouldn’t even look at her, and his dislike for her judgement call radiated through his gaze, especially when Rogers came up to wrap an arm around her waist and kiss her forehead.  

“How’re you hanging in there?”

“M’fine,” she murmured, leaning into his hold as he took on most of her weight.  He tried not to laugh and helped her walk back into the tower.  During the attack the top floors had, again, suffered heavy casualties but at least the lower ones were working well enough.  It would be where they stayed again as they tried to bring the city back once more.  How much could one place take, Nat wondered grimly as Rogers steered her into a different room and disappeared into the attached on bathroom.  There was the sound of running water, and when he came back he helped her undress before carrying her back into the white-tiled room.  With gentle, slow movements he lowered her into the slowly filling tub, the water hot and a relief against her sore, exhausted body.  Not two minutes later Rogers sank in behind her, pulling her up onto his lap as the water rose around them.  

“Who are you and what did you do with Rogers?” Nat muttered, tipping her head up so she could look at him, her words slurred together in her exhaustion.  He laughed, leaning over to turn off the water before it could spill over the top.  

“I thought we could save some water by bathing together,” he teased.  “Isn’t that what a good person does?  Thinks about the world around them and not just themselves?”

“Since when are you a good person?”  It’s meant to come out as a jibe but in her exhaustion perhaps it carried more weight than it was supposed to because beneath her Rogers went still.  “Sorry,” she murmured when she realized her mistake.  “Didn’t mean that.  M’Tired.”  

He nodded that he understood and they laid there in the water, quiet and on the verge of sleep, neither wanting to move or disturb the silence that settled around them.  No explosions, no calls from Fury, nothing but blessed peace.  Rogers’ body was strong and warm against Nat’s back, and she turned to the side to curl up with him, eyes shutting as she flirted with the idea of falling asleep.  They didn’t move until the water became too cold to bear.

“Thank you for taking my side.”  It was the first thing that Rogers said since they’d gotten out, the super soldier having laid her out on the bed and wrapped her up in blankets until she was warm and cuddly and oh, he was expecting a response?

“You’re welcome,” she rasped, offering him a lazy smile.  She hadn’t felt this taken care of, this comfortable in years.  Decades.  It was a nice feeling, especially after the beating Loki had put her body through.  Whether or not Rogers fell asleep soon after, or even said anything past that Nat couldn’t tell, already back asleep.  Maybe she’d get lucky, she thought with the last threads of her consciousness, and she’d be able to finish that damn dream.  

 


	6. Chapter 6

Everything calmed down after a few days, Steve coming around to talk to Nat the never next day, and soon she and the two renditions of Captain America fell into an easy pattern: Steve would teach Rogers how to cook, while Rogers and Nat would go through the finer points of combat with Steve.  It seemed that while he was taking on the frost giants he’d ran into a bit of a problem, not wanting to kill them because they were still innocent lives being wasted on the teachings of a madman.  At least that was how he saw it.  Eventually his past training seemed to kick in, and it was with a wide grin he managed to flip Tony onto his back and pin him without hardly an effort.  The billionaire simply rolled his eyes, snarky comment that without his suit he was one of the weaker Avengers punctured by coughs.  Steve patted him on the back while Rogers offered a laugh.  The second version of Cap had loosened up considerably since the battle with Loki, and had even resigned himself to rejoining with his twin.  It was why they were trying too hard to teach Steve how to let go, sure that once he mastered that it would be much easier.

The good soldier helped Stark up to his feet, promising that it had still been a good fight, and to everyone’s surprise--including Steve’s--he pressed a quick kiss to the man’s lips.  There was a pause as everyone gawked, Tony’s eyes wide as the arc reactor in his chest, and a quick blush covered Steve’s cheeks as it sunk in what he’d just done.  

“Oh--ah--crap.  Sorry,” he murmured as he turned and all but ran away, likely disappearing to the kitchen to go scrub at the dishes or cook.  That seemed to be his go-to stress reliever now that they were separate.  Rogers was the first to react, letting out a quick bark of a laugh, while Tony and Nat just marveled, both at a loss for words.  

“About damn time,” Rogers muttered.  “Cap--when we were all together in one piece--he had a huge thing for you, Tony.  Just about as bad as he did for you, Natasha.  I talked to Bruce about it after the first time Stark and I fucked, and he said that the residual emotions would likely manifest in both of us.”

And here Nat thought he’d just been looking to screw whoever was nearest.  Her stomach did a tiny flop that Stark must’ve felt, too, given the flash of discomfort and surprise on his face.  

“Right.  So, uh, should I just go talk to him?” He looked nervous.  Emotions had never been his strongest but neither had they been Nat’s before Steve came along.  Not for the first time did she wonder if this accident wasn’t a good thing.  

“No, give him some time.  I had it easy: no previous social constraint to worry about; I just did what I pleased.  I still kind of do.  Steve’s head is sometimes still stuck in the forties, though, especially in some of the social beliefs.  That makes it difficult for him to come to terms with the fact that he likes both men and women.  But this is a good sign, right?”  He asked, looking between the spy and the genius.  “It shows that he’s finally coming over to my side, to the dark side.”  

Nat groaned.  “I am never letting Tony show you movies again.”  

Stark just started laughing, finally breaking out of his reverie enough to look over at the two.  Rogers joined right in, and shortly after Nat couldn’t help but do the same, letting the laughter bubble up inside her and out her lips.  They left Steve alone to think on what had happened, all of them thinking he might need some distance for a little bit to pull his head together.  Stark was the first to talk to him, thinking it might a good idea if they came out with it, and Rogers watched him go with a little bit of envy in his eyes and face.  Nat frowned.  

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing.”  He said, too quickly, then sighed.  “I’m just--I’ve never had someone look that way when they were gearing up to go talk to me, all determined and drunk on their emotions.  It’s always just: “hey, let’s fuck” and that’s cool.  Nothing wrong with it; I just can’t wait till I’m back in one body and I can pretend that it’s me they want.”  He paused, then snorted.  “I can’t believe how pathetic that sounded.”

Natasha felt her heart ache a little at his words, and moved over to pull him into a tight hug, her head resting against his chest.  He froze up for a moment before returning it, and Nat wondered what else he was holding back and keeping from everyone else.  From himself, even.  He’d seemed as surprised by his confession as Nat had been.  

“You know, I seem to remember someone having a very similar reaction to the first time they saw me,” Natasha murmured quietly, looking up at him with the smallest smile and a glint in her eye.  His mouth opened to gape for a moment before he started to try and backtrack.  She shook her head and put her hand on his shoulder.  

“Stop.  You understand now, and that’s all that I could ask for.  At least you can empathize and I’m sure for however long you’re still Rogers you won’t do it again because you’ll always reflect on that,” she reminded him with a small smile. “But the progress is a step in the right direction,” she promised him. He just nodded, looking numb, and she reached down to squeeze his hand.  

“Hey, let’s go see how Stark and Steve are doing.  Wanna put money on which one of them started crying first?” She teased, nudging him a little.  As Rogers laughed and walked with his arm around Nat she grew silent and reflective herself.  A few years ago, hell a few months ago she never would’ve imagined doing this.  Not just walking with a guy, but opening up like this.  Talking about more than just fighting and strategy and what was the next move.  She wouldn’t have thought twice about bringing up emotions--his or hers--because they were simply too complicated, too dangerous in a fight.  As her best friend Clint had gotten the closest, but Cap?  Well she’d not thought him any way interested in how she was besides checking her mental capacity for continuing with a fight.  ‘He’s a great team leader,’ she thought, ‘and a great guy.’  But that didn’t mean that he was always so front and center with everyone about how they felt at the end of the day.  Contrary to what everyone seemed to think, Cap hadn’t really cared to get into everyone’s business, assured that so long as they were ready for a fight that meant they were sound enough.  Only when things got really bad--like they had when Tony had tried to square off against the Mandarin--had he ever bothered to call the man up and ask him what was going on, was he okay, just to find that he was about three days late and Tony was already on his way back to Manhattan.  

Not that it was much Steve’s fault, considering he and Nat were on a mission at the time, but that was a thought for another day.  

They didn’t make it very far to wherever Steve and Tony had disappeared to before Rogers stopped Nat with a hand on her shoulder.  

“Is it wrong of me to be, I dunno, envious of the attention that Steve gets?” He asked. His voice was quiet, as though he was ashamed to even be considering the idea. Nat couldn’t help but smile, and surprising even herself she reached one hand up to cup the side of his face.

“I wondered if you did, if you were just acting out before to get attention.”  

“You make me sound like I’m five,” he muttered.

“I don’t know about five.  You’re at least two years older than Tony is so maybe seven.”  

In spite of himself Rogers laughed.  

Nat continued.  “We’re all children when it comes to some things.”  Rogers eyed her and shook his head.

“You aren’t.”

Sure she was.  She’d always said love was for children, and as the emotion registered in her mind her stomach tightened.  Oh, hell.  Without saying anything else she stood on her toes to kiss him the way she’d always wanted to be: gently enough to stop her breath but with enough passion to weaken her knees and stop her heart.  Beneath her Rogers gave a low moan, one hand planted on her hip the other running up and down her spine.  They barely made it to the bedroom before clothing started falling to the floor.  

When he pushed into her she gave a  low, shivering moan that made her gut clench and toes curl, and much rather than fuck her brains out the way she was used to Rogers started to take his time, fingertips exploring and caressing every inch of skin, lips and limbs tangling with hers as their bodies bucked and canted, arched and seized together as they chased their own orgasms, both so near it was as if they had come together.  This was nothing like the Rogers she had become familiar with, Nat reflected as he held her loosely in his arms, lips leaving feather-light kisses all along her collarbone, and his sensitive side was catching her entirely, uncomfortably, off guard.

 

By the time they showed up for dinner, Natasha’s grin a little wider than perhaps strictly necessary and Rogers’ hair much more mussed up, they found Bruce, Tony, and Steve gathered around a bowl of what looked like guacamole and tequila shots.  Nat couldn’t help but laugh as she watched Steve take a shot and pull a face.

“What are you playing?” She asked, moving to grab a chip from the bag and scoop up a decent chunk of the green dip.  Delicious; she loved it when Bruce cooked.  

“Never have I,” Tony said, his eyes already glazed.  “Steve is losing.”

“Am not,” Steve murmured.

“YEP!” Tony slurred.  “And Bruce . . . Bruce is a dirty birdy.  He’s done a lot more than he likes to make us think--don’t--don’t let his calm sciencey demeanor fool you,” he slurred, wrapping an arm around the man’s shoulders.  Bruce just chuckled, his color perhaps a little higher in his cheeks than normal, but his eyes looked normal and he seemed more relaxed than anything.  

“I play dirty, that’s for sure,” Bruce countered.  

“I want to play,” Nat grinned, her eyes going bright as she took a seat beside Steve and kissed his cheek.  Rogers sat between Tony and Bruce, asking to be counted in as well.  Though it may have seemed idiotic to have the two versions of Captain play, to say that they’d done many different things within the past few weeks was . . . well, Nat was sure that Steve would have the upperhand.  

As it turned out, Natasha had done far too much, especially when Bruce was as crafty as he said about figuring out how word the things he hadn’t done so that he could intentionally make others drinking.  While Steve had gotten away with “Never have I had sex,” which just made Tony call bullshit and Nat and Rogers catch each other’s grin, Bruce just grinned and let it all pass him by.  He was rather good at targeting people, and while Steve, Rogers, and Stark had both Bruce and Nat on never being in a long lasting monogamous relationship, Nat got them all back by saying that she’d never had a dick, to which Steve had replied “Never had I had sex with a woman.”

“Cheater,” Nat muttered as she took a shot.  

Tony demanded answers as Steve flushed three shades of red and Rogers’ grin tripled in size.  

“It was part of my mission!” Nat had insisted with a laugh as she felt the tequila singing in her veins.  “And, well, she wasn’t a half bad looker--.”

“I just knew you swung both ways!” He exclaimed, the color in his cheeks high as the alcohol increased the volume in his voice as well.  “Called it!”

“Shut up,” Nat said with a chuckle, rolling her eyes.  “Never have I created a mechanical suit all by myself.”

“Bitch.”

Three bottles of tequila later Rogers and Bruce both had to help Tony back to his room, the pair snickering as Tony explained how much he loved them both, before calling back to Steve and Nat: “And you two!  Just fucking . . . fuck.  Make-out.  Something.  I love you both,” he grinned before he was pulled around the corner and upstairs.  Nat could practically hear Jarvis sighing with disbelief above them, but her attention was soon changed to the now-very close Steve.  His impossibly blue eyes were glazed and his pupils nearly fully dilated as he looked deeply into her own eyes.  She swallowed hard.  When the hell had he gotten so close?  He was adorable, she had to say, with his bright pink cheeks and the way his hair was perfectly parted and how he pressed his lips hard, demandingly, against hers as he bent her backwards over onto the table.

Wait, what?  Was this Steve?  

She moaned as she opened her mouth, his hips snapping against hers as he positioned himself between her legs.  His breath was hot and tasted of the lemon and salt he’d demanded along with his tequila, and she loved every moment of it, practically sucking on his bottom lip.  He moaned.  Her hands were quick as they tried to get his shirt off, pulling and pressing and all but ripping it from his chest so she could rake her nails over the skin she was becoming so familiar with.  

Well, they’d talked about deflowering him, hadn’t they?  

He took her right there on the table, the liquor--which had only kicked in, they would later find out, because the pair of them had been separated.  Something about the division had messed with their metabolic process--made it easier for him to let go, and once he was fully seated inside her, his hips pressed hard against hers and a soft cry on his lips of pure, raw pleasure, she wrapped her legs around his waist and urged him on.  He figured out what to do soon afterwards, picking up the pace at the same time she did so that they were arching into one another and had the other’s names on their lips.  It was nearly perfect, Nat thought quietly, especially for his first time.  

They very nearly passed out the minute that he finished, Nat absolutely exhausted from having gone through both of them in the same day, and Steve’s lips spread in the biggest, widest smile Nat had ever seen before.  

“I love you,” he murmured quietly a she pulled away from where she’d just kissed him.  

“I know,” she said quietly.  “I love you, too.”  

Something in her heart twisted and she swallowed hard as she tried not to realize how open she left herself to both of them.  To Captain as a whole.  She hadn’t thought she’d be able to do it, certainly not with everything that she’d seen and been through, but with Steve Rogers?  Well, maybe.  She wanted to at least give it a shot.  

After picking up what scraps of clothing they had left Steve carried Natasha back to her room, curling up into her bed with her after asking her permission.  Like she’d say no.  She let him wrap his arms around her, relaxed against his chest, and breathed deep the familiar scent of him.  Yes.  She could get used to this, she could learn how to open herself up she supposed.  It wouldn’t be easy, and there was no way it would be quick, but she could do it.

 

The warm body beside her in the morning started to panic by the time that Natasha opened her eyes, the heart speeding up as its owner looked around.  She could feel his whole body begin to tremble and eventually Steve--her brain reminded her--said “Nat?  What the heck?  What happened?”

Great. Damn tequila had wiped his memory.  She sat up and smiled when it hit her.  Something was off about him, or rather it was far too familiar.  

“Steve Rogers?”

“Yeah.  You know anyone else?” He asked, curious as he looked her over, then caught himself staring at her breasts and blushed.  “Oh, God.  I took advantage of you.  Oh gosh Nat, I’m so sorry.”

“No, Steve, you’re fine,” she smiled and pressed her lips to his forehead.  He stopped where he was laying, staying stock still, and she reminded herself not to do that again.  Great.  

 

By the end of the day he started to remember everything, the different views of his life for the past few days coming together bit by bit to create a cohesive idea of the time he’d spent and how it had been divided up between Steve and Rogers.  Nat had to admit that she missed the two, especially since she’d finally gotten to see such a different side of Steve.  He’d been so free, unafraid of himself.  It was sexy, not that he wasn’t now, but they’d just have to work on it.

He still couldn’t believe what he’d done, and she was sure he was beating himself up for doing anything to begin with.  No matter how often Nat, or Stark when he’d come down after hearing the news, reassured him that yes, they were fine with it--they’d liked it, and wanted to do it again--he still had the same, shocked reaction.  

They’d just started winding down when Nat pushed him down into the seat beside him, climbed atop his lap, and pressed her lips to his.  He didn’t move and for half a second she thought she pushed him too far too fast.  But Rogers was there, and Rogers she wanted.  She wanted both of them, wanted them to know that just because he was afraid of hurting her didn’t mean she didn’t want them.  Him.  All of him.  

When he kissed her back it was tentative but comfortably familiar, and she grinned against his lips as she raked her hands through his hair.  “Thought that might get you to shut up,” she murmured when she had to pull away for air.  

He tried for a laugh but it failed, too nervous looking.  Nat nearly choked on her disbelief.  

“I just don’t want to take advantage of you--.”

“Okay, Steve Rogers.  I have a deal for you,” she said quickly before he could say anything else.  He rhand covered his mouth and smiled when he looked, curiously, up at her.  “I owe you a first date.  Or you owe me if you want to think of it that way.  Anyway.  After that will you allow me to tell you that I like you and I would like to do physical acts with you?” She was only half teasing.  

So help her if he said no.  

But he nodded his head, the hand moving to hold her hip, as comfortable as if he’d done it for all of their lives.  She smiled at the contact.  

“Alright.  I can do that.”  

“Don’t you dare be late,” she said as she kissed his cheek, and only then, when she decided to go easy on him, did she stand up to go.  “And hurry up because I’m not a patient woman--.”

His hand wrapped around her wrist before she could disappear.  “Wanna go have dinner?”

Atta boy.  

“I’d love to, Cap.  Lead the way.”  

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally, finally got this out and finished and I'm so sorry it's taken forever and a day to finish this fic, but I hope it's very much worth it and not too anticlimactic. More feels in this part than the rest, I feel, and it just felt-I dunno-right to end it here. I might end up working on an epilogue, but for now we're going to say this is done. Thanks so much for sticking with it for so long, I really appreciate it!


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